Part 3 Stories We Tell Ourselves & Wishing They Could Bring Happy
Up to now, we looked at setting some goals, wants, desires; I mean, it is still January of a new year! And I know you have taken dozens and dozens of experts’ advice and courses on how to increase wealth, health and the ever illusive happiness! Then you put your goals together based on what others may or may not have suggested, right?
Yup, me too! I think we both agree however, that underneath all our goals and wants, we just want to be happy! I mean, isn’t that why we plan and write, and dream and ….
Let me ask you this. What if you could rub the lantern and the genie pops out and grants you the wishes of your life? Poof! Done! Now, you would you be happy, right?
A lot of people dream of winning the lottery – that’s asking the genie.
Others consider marrying rich – that’s asking the genie.
Still others gather and gather information, courses, sources and such to fill the mind with confirmation and validation they are brilliant and everyone is going to love them and respect them for what they have gained! That’s asking the genie!
Now, let me ask you this. Are the winners of lotteries happy? Oh sure for the first several hundred thousand! Stats prove that 95% lose all the money within a few years! How about those who marry the rich and famous? Are they happy. Have you read the tabloids lately? If you don’t believe the tabloids how about the federal and state divorce stats! More than 50% divorce within months – not even years! Yikes! What about all the hoop-la and the necessity of pre-nups? Hmmm, this should show you that genie doesn’t work either!
Here’s another example. Up here in Canada, hockey is a huge dream for practically all athletically minded boys. Even the girls are on the bandwagon! And many get to a level of achievement that could take them to the next step – the professional NHL level.
And within that level, many find themselves – happy?
Not according to their spouses, the children and parents. They tell "stories" about how unhappy they are because their loved one is on the road ALL THE TIME!
Not according to the news and particularly what has happened this past year, sadly, not happily, 3 successful players took their own lives! Those beautiful souls told themselves "stories" about what they felt or didn't feel about their lives!
Now how come the genie didn’t see that coming?
Most would ask for more money, better career, improving relationships, and so on.
But why don’t you ask for happy?
Here’s why. We perceive that if we change the outer, THEN, we can be happier!!
We hope that underneath the thing, we’ll finally get happy!
Most of us are still on that same track years in, years out, over and over, a lifetime in fact, that if we change “out there” we’ll be happier!
I hear you saying, “Yes, and I know this! So I’ve been working on the inner stuff!”
How many of you have changed “in here” as well? Things like taking a course, meditation, yoga, exercise, body exercise, stretching, more physical stuff, mental stuff, and even emotional stuff.
Soooo are you happier?
Hmmm, let’s be totally honest here.
Here’s why. We perceive that if we tap into only the positive stuff and ignore or eliminate the negative stuff, we’ll be happier!
Things still failed.
In the next issue, I’m going to talk more about this positive vs negative stuff.
I can’t do it here right now because you’ve already been reading my rant for quite a few minutes. I feel strongly, you move away from the computer, find a mirror, put a great big smile on your face and for the current moment, look into your eyes and be happy of about who you are, where you are and with whom you are.
Yes – leave now and do this little exercise.
Why? Because, when I tell you more about how absurd positive and negative are, you will fight me on this one, I guarantee.
But one more thing. What are you telling yourself right now about what I just wrote? You are telling yourself a story about what you perceive to be right about your opinion of positive and negative emotions!
That’s what I want you to really grab a hold of – the story you are telling yourself right now – because when we come back, you’ll know how powerful your mind is and it’s what keeps you from staying happy!!
So for now, have a wonderful day, stay cool and great job!